Virgin Diaries Is The Real American Horror Story

It’s hard enough for me to understand two people falling in love and vowing to save sex for after marriage, but if that’s the way they were brought up or it’s the easiest way for them to repress their flaming gayness (which is really what I think they must be doing), fine. The ones who save KISSING each other for after marriage are in for a downward spiral of wedded hell and if you don’t believe me, just watch this preview for TLC’s The Virgin Diaries:

I mean, what happens when you say “I do” and then realize that the person you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with is a horrifically bad kisser? I had to squint while trying to get the youtube url to post in here because I couldn’t stand the thought of watching them maw on each other any longer. (Thanks to Eric “they look like two birds trying to eat bread together” for the tip. Also, eff you for the tip).