If you were a child of the 70’s or early 80’s there’s a pretty good chance you had the book
“Where Did I Come From” (or at least I’m hoping I wasn’t the only one). It was a book for a liberal household whose parents didn’t necessarily want to explain the birds and the bees to their children but didn’t mind reading about a loving, naked, cherub cartoon couple.
The book taught me many things, much to the delight of my camp counselors whom I repeatedly told the story to as a five-year-old. What the book didn’t teach me though, is that beyond the shared physical characteristics of your parents you also sometimes get their mannerisms, their sensitivity and possibly even their unique interests.
Those of you who know me either from life or from the Internet most likely are very aware that pop culture runs through my veins. I can answer things from Jeopardy that I didn’t even realize I knew; I am more interested in Saved By The Bell trivia than I am in politics and when I hear the name Tiny Tim I think of the high-pitched ukulele player first and the Dickens character second. Why is this? Well, it’s because of where I came from.
Somehow, while my mom and I didn’t live in the same house after the age of 6, her love of pop culture was instilled in me. I have been on the receiving end of phone calls that start with, “Did you know such and such porn star is Jewish?”.
One of my very early memories involves my mom and the short-lived competitive lip-synching show, Puttin’ On The Hits. It was the early 80’s and the hair was big, the competition was fierce and my mom was ready to compete. I have wished upon a star that video footage of her performance exists, but I haven’t found any. The great news is, there are a few pictures.
My mom did not go as Susana Hoffs or Teena Marie. You can bet your ass Marie Osmond wasn’t even being considered. And while close, Sheila E. didn’t do the job. Instead, she performed as his royal purpleness, Prince. So when I ask, “Where did I come from?”, the answer, quite simply, is here -this is where I come from:
#1 – the pic of your mom…awesome.
#2 – we always wanted to be on Puttin’ On The Hits.
#3 – one of us TOTALLY had that WHERE DID I COME FROM BOOK. It described an orgasm as being similar to a really nice sneeze.
LOL! You definitely had the book! I was always like, “What the hell is up with that little baby boy’s peen?”. But damn I loved that chubby couple. I was also a fan of the sperm drawing.
According to my mom, she performed “When Doves Cry” and in her dance she did the splits and was able to come back from to a standing position. That hurts my groin just thinking about it.
Well this explains everything. When I saw this photo of your mom I nearly died with envy. It’s too bad you can’t go back in time and be your mom’s BFF at the same age. The upshot is, seeing how much you look like your mom, you could totally pull this costume off yourself. You’ve got the cheekbones to be a Prince.
Um, if this show came back today I don’t even know where I’d START! My guess is that I’d end up going the Salt N Peppa route because it involves more dance and I sure as hell cannot do the splits.
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